I’m Making A List, And Checking It Twice…
Pretty much a Ronseal post this one. Many things have been touched upon in this, One For The Road’s first 6 months after being shat into existence in a fit of rage and frustration back in May 2007. Politics (which I know nothing about), alcohol (of which I am aquainted), television, gigs, relationships, Ireland being shit, Dublin being great, the GAA, the FAI, and other bloggers. So where do YOU fit into the equation? Will you be getting a Nintendo Wii or a sack of shit off Santy this year? Why not have a look see?
Propa Nawty:
Bertie Ahern for being a scurrilous little snake-oil merchant.
Mary Harney for being a fat head and being shite at her job.
The HSE for trying to kill all of us.
Dublin Bus Drivers for being lazy cunts.
Mizzoni’s pizza place in Clondalkin for giving me the shits.
My job for moving offices twenty minutes walk further away from my bus stop.
MCD and whatever other fuckwits decided to put QOTSA on in the Ambassador.
Metallica for not playing the RDS again this year like they said they would.
Blogs.ie for being shit.
Pat Kenny for ruining the toy show.
Kings of Leon for bringing out a fucking shit album.
Radiohead for bringing out another album full stop.
Brian Cowen for telling us to tighten our belts. Fuck you I won’t do what you tell me.
John Delaney, the FAI, Steve Staunton and Wor Uncle Sir Bobby Robson for being shit at everything.
The Irish rugby team for being even shitter than the football fags.
The Irish media for their shameful coverage of the Katy French affair.
Bertie again for sending his representative to her funeral.
The ex-Mrs. One For The Road for obvious reasons.
The weather for being a total cunt and making it rain all through the summer.
My laptop for wrecking my head with it’s stupid little pop up suggestions every 5 minutes.
O2 Broadband for being worse than Aids.
My local for having shit cover bands like Franklin playing every Friday and Sunday nights.
Irish women for copying the slaggy brits and going out with no jackets and tits hanging out for all to see.
Nice and Juicy:
Irish women for copying the slaggy brits and going out with no jackets and tits hanging out for all to see.
My local for getting in Budvar and Erdinger behind the bar.
My local for apparently contacting a Czech modelling agency to hire it’s staff.
The Besnard Lakes for releasing the album of the year.
WordPress for saving my blog! Huzzah!
Gruff Rhys for putting on the gig of the year in Vicar St.
Super Furry Animals for playing in Dublin twice this year.
Thomas Reads in Smithfield for holding a monthly Rockabilly night.
The Bernard Shaw for being a great boozer.
Lovebox in Malahide castle for being ace.
The month of October for being chock full of great gigs that didn’t cost €70.
Facebook for helping me find some lovely people who I’d lost contact with.
The Gaeity for never refusing me entry, no matter how stocious I may have been at the time.
The city of Munich for Oktoberfest.
The city of Copenhagen for Roskilde.
Icelandic ladies for taking my mind off things just when I needed it.
My new appartment which is coming along nicely thank you very much.
My da for showing me how to use a drill properly after about 30 years.
Lovefoxx from CSS for being born.
And finally all of you who have been kind enough to read this blog, link to it, and make comments on it. Seriously. Thanks.
So to all of you on the nice list, here’s your present from me. Sufjan Stevens ‘Put The Lights On The Tree’.
awww.
sap.
It’s Sufjan Stevens, Rosie. He makes me want to say nice things.
I *aquired* his complete Christmas collection last month. It’s fantastic. The Little Drummer Boy makes me well up like an idiot.
Kings of Leon for bringing out a fucking shit album. WRONG it’s their best album to date……
Metallica for not playing the RDS again this year like they said they would WRONG please please never again……just so awful
“My job for moving offices twenty minutes walk further away from my bus stop.”
Maybe you need the exercise you fat cunt
“Metallica for not playing the RDS again this year like they said they would”
Hit them where it hurts them most… download their music
Rosie’s right. You’re a sap. That said this is one of the best end of year posts I’ve hit upon yet. And you’ve just reminded me that I bought Sufjan Stevens Christmas Album last year, I guess I should blow the dust off it and get a bit festive soonish.
And in all of that you never mentioned your Mammy!
So where’s your local with all these Czech honeys?
In Rainbows?????????????? But it’s an unmittigated triumph.
KOL’s album is grand. Grand.
Also I think Metallica suck balls, but I know many of my friends would beg to differ. Meh.
Anyway, I’ll stop picking holes, the rest is largely spot on. Though I didn’t know your ex, and I have never been to Clondalkin.
Don’t be dissin’ your ex like that, it’s not cricket. KOL album is very good. All the rest is magic. Keep it up fella.
ps. How do you punch a kitten in the cock?
Merry Listmas!
Peace to all men… (women can go fuck themselves)
Brilliant look at how we are surrounded by hollow people !
Life and times can be tough. Disappointments are always around the corner, but if you have a nice place to come home to, a warm bed, enough food and water, and people who love you then you can take on the world !
Remember, as the song says,
“When your eyes are bright with tears,
But your mind can see – another life – another galaxy”
Paul Simon (with respect)
Then You will overcome he bastards. Yeah, corn, but true.
Jackie Rustle.
Should never have taught that dog how to type!
‘The Little Drummer Boy makes me well up like an idiot’
Twas always your favourite xmas song.
And no thanks to me? Cheers.
No it wasn’t. It was Send in the Cavalry by Jonah Louie. Duba duba dum dum, duba duba dum
I aggree that Metallica are rubbish these days, but last year they played the whole Master Of Puppets album, and the year before was like a greatest hits gig. And they’re brilliant live. And Hetfield is a legend. And Metallica ROCK LIKE BASTARDS!!!!!
I thought the KOL comment might get a bit of stick – but I think it’s derivitave AOR FM radio friendly ‘rawk’. Especially compared to the first two albums, which are stonewall classics. It’s like Urban Hymns compared to Storm In Heaven.
I have always disliked Radiohead, so their new album just filled me with ‘meh’.
I would also like to thank my mother for lots of stuff. And my sister for going to gigs with me in my singledom.
Now. Anyone who doesn’t say something nice is banned from this blog.
Seriously, I thought my ‘Listmas’ gag deserved a reckon.
You were making a list, checking it…
…
Honestly, I don’t know why I bover.
I doff my cap to you jd.
*doff*
oh look. It fell in some shit.
Merry Shitmas.